By Bibi Egbekun I used to silently judge my mother for leaving my siblings and me with our grandmother when we were kids. Every time something bad happened, I blamed and judged her. She was a widow, uneducated, and had four of us. I swore that would never be me. I'd never let my kids out of sight, even for a second. Now I watch my kids cling to my mother, and I am glad to get some rest. I direct them to her when they come crying and need me. I lay in bed long after everyone had gone to sleep, thinking about our next meal and keeping the roof over our heads. Two weeks after childbirth, I started a new job, leaving the newborn with my mother. With aching breasts, a sore abdomen, and terrible back pains, I count my blessings, and my mother is the biggest of them all.
I am educated and married. My husband is a good man, but the bills keep mounting up. Now my children run to my mother when they fall and hurt their knees. She's the one they give those little hugs to, and she's the one whose stick figures are on the fridge with lots of heart shapes around the drawing. I know my kids will judge me one day, but I hope they go easy on me and understand that mommy had to go to work so they wouldn't sleep in the streets.
20 Comments
Emelda Ita
2/3/2023 08:06:59 am
This is beautiful and heart-warming!
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Abosi Delight Orie
4/3/2023 10:27:50 am
He who wears the shoes knows where it aches...
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Ojoye oluwaseun kikelomo
4/3/2023 11:07:59 am
I love this piece short but yet captivating.
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Chidinma Nnalue
5/3/2023 12:44:31 am
I wish this essay was longer. Super well done Bibi. Thank you for sharing your story. And, really, as the proverb goes, the thing that the elder sees, a child may never see even if they climb a tree. Your experience as a mother has taught you what you didn't know when you were younger.
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Ikechukwu Victory
5/3/2023 02:31:52 pm
There is a popular saying, "you'd never know how it feels till you get into the system"
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Ayomide Deborah
8/3/2023 03:50:12 pm
There is a saying " You need to put yourself in another person's shoes to truly understand". The essay portrays this proverb well. Bibi demonstrates the true plight of a mother and all the troubles they have to go through for our sakes. This is a beautiful masterpiece which persuades me to re-think the struggles our mothers go through for our sake and if we really give them the praise they clearly deserve.
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Wisdom Adediji
8/3/2023 04:10:10 pm
Time will break what doesn't bends. I find different meanings to this piece. I learnt from it, that time is a weapon to reveal the truth. She once blamed her mother for not being there, but now she finds herself in the same shoes even though she's not a widow.
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Dauda Musbau
10/3/2023 09:23:48 am
This is very laconic yet captivating. The message here is clear, appreciate your mother and never be too quick to judge.
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Ifunanya Georgia Ezeano
11/3/2023 08:27:33 am
This is beautiful to read. You don't know where and how it hurts until you wear the shoe yourself.
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Amobi Chisom Dorin
11/3/2023 10:18:22 am
Beautiful piece Ma'am Bibi
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Olaide Oyindamola
11/3/2023 12:34:59 pm
Short but captivating
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Juliana Obasi
11/3/2023 02:33:43 pm
Wow! This indeed is captivating and real!
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Victoria Aderinto
11/3/2023 09:17:01 pm
It's pretty easy to judge when the shoe doesn't fit; when we don't know the reason behind certain actions. I judged my mother for certain things while growing up, but in this moment, I understand the reason behind her actions and inaction. Thank you, Bibi.
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Kalu Henrietta
11/3/2023 09:36:20 pm
Short, but detailed and captivating.
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Arinze Daniel Udoye
12/3/2023 07:32:04 am
Most times, we become the people we judge. It just takes time. I do hope when your children want to judge you, they say the good motives behind your leaving them for their grandmother.
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15/3/2023 07:52:33 pm
Stories do not need to carry the lenghy pages of novels to send captivating messages to it's reader. That's the kind of story Motherhood is: short, simple but with a powerful message that leaves one thinking long and hard about the eccentricity of life. Certainly, for one truly understand something, one has to experience it as they say," experience/ life isthe best teacher."
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16/3/2023 12:04:31 pm
I am not married yet and I already envisage shipping the kids off to my mum for the holidays. The stress of going to work while pursuing your dreams combined with taking care of children is a whole lot. So yes your kids will understand when the time comes, the same way you did.
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Rebecca
20/3/2023 11:41:18 am
Did you say shipping off?😂
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Rebecca
20/3/2023 11:45:11 am
Short and captivating.
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Ezekiel Blessing Idoreyin
23/3/2023 10:42:28 am
Short and beautiful.
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