MOTHERHOOD

1/3/2023

By Bibi Egbekun

I used to silently judge my mother for leaving my siblings and me with our grandmother when we were kids. Every time something bad happened, I blamed and judged her. She was a widow, uneducated, and had four of us. I swore that would never be me. I'd never let my kids out of sight, even for a second. Now I watch my kids cling to my mother, and I am glad to get some rest. I direct them to her when they come crying and need me. I lay in bed long after everyone had gone to sleep, thinking about our next meal and keeping the roof over our heads.

Two weeks after childbirth, I started a new job, leaving the newborn with my mother. With aching breasts, a sore abdomen, and terrible back pains, I count my blessings, and my mother is the biggest of them all.

I am educated and married. My husband is a good man, but the bills keep mounting up. Now my children run to my mother when they fall and hurt their knees. She's the one they give those little hugs to, and she's the one whose stick figures are on the fridge with lots of heart shapes around the drawing.

I know my kids will judge me one day, but I hope they go easy on me and understand that mommy had to go to work so they wouldn't sleep in the streets.

Writer's Biography

Bibi Egbekun is a writer and a mom of two adorable kids. She has published a short story and hopes to publish more books in the coming years.

20 Comments

Emelda Ita

2/3/2023 08:06:59 am

This is beautiful and heart-warming!
How time gradually unfurls understanding....

Abosi Delight Orie

4/3/2023 10:27:50 am

He who wears the shoes knows where it aches...
We never know how it is until we experience it
It's not easy and thank God for your mom

Ojoye oluwaseun kikelomo

4/3/2023 11:07:59 am

I love this piece short but yet captivating.

Chidinma Nnalue

5/3/2023 12:44:31 am

I wish this essay was longer. Super well done Bibi. Thank you for sharing your story. And, really, as the proverb goes, the thing that the elder sees, a child may never see even if they climb a tree. Your experience as a mother has taught you what you didn't know when you were younger.

Ikechukwu Victory

5/3/2023 02:31:52 pm

There is a popular saying, "you'd never know how it feels till you get into the system"
Learning not to judge without substantial reasons is a virtue.
Mother's hurt alot, they are not some sort of robotics. I could tell with my mother.
They can act like super humans but deep down they need a hug and a shoulder to relieve all their pains and stress.
I love your masterpiece but i wish it was longer.
All the same, weldone.

Ayomide Deborah

8/3/2023 03:50:12 pm

There is a saying " You need to put yourself in another person's shoes to truly understand". The essay portrays this proverb well. Bibi demonstrates the true plight of a mother and all the troubles they have to go through for our sakes. This is a beautiful masterpiece which persuades me to re-think the struggles our mothers go through for our sake and if we really give them the praise they clearly deserve.

Wisdom Adediji

8/3/2023 04:10:10 pm

Time will break what doesn't bends. I find different meanings to this piece. I learnt from it, that time is a weapon to reveal the truth. She once blamed her mother for not being there, but now she finds herself in the same shoes even though she's not a widow.

Dauda Musbau

10/3/2023 09:23:48 am

This is very laconic yet captivating. The message here is clear, appreciate your mother and never be too quick to judge.

Ifunanya Georgia Ezeano

11/3/2023 08:27:33 am

This is beautiful to read. You don't know where and how it hurts until you wear the shoe yourself.

Amobi Chisom Dorin

11/3/2023 10:18:22 am

Beautiful piece Ma'am Bibi
Life has a way of turning things around.
I enjoyed every bit of it

Olaide Oyindamola

11/3/2023 12:34:59 pm

Short but captivating

Juliana Obasi

11/3/2023 02:33:43 pm

Wow! This indeed is captivating and real!

I feel it's an age-long desire, to not repeat the perceived 'mistakes', that our parents made or better still, do more than they did.

But somehow and someway, time and chance happens to us and we realize our incapacity to change the existing narrative on our own.

I remember my mum's constant re-organization and re-arrangement of the house. I used to be so exhausted afterwards- I told myself that I'd never do it.

I laugh at myself looking back; you could very much guess- I do the same thing in my home now, with even more excitement than my mum used to have! Time and Chance!

Victoria Aderinto

11/3/2023 09:17:01 pm

It's pretty easy to judge when the shoe doesn't fit; when we don't know the reason behind certain actions. I judged my mother for certain things while growing up, but in this moment, I understand the reason behind her actions and inaction. Thank you, Bibi.

(I also highly recommend Micah Bournes "Dear Dad." It's a beautiful spoken word piece that reflects Bibi's piece.)

Kalu Henrietta

11/3/2023 09:36:20 pm

Short, but detailed and captivating.
A woman is all. Sacrificing so much just to give her children the best. She maybe misunderstood along the way, but since life is a circle and every woman will revolve at her own time, we all will tell our own story and appreciate/understand every woman we see.

Arinze Daniel Udoye

12/3/2023 07:32:04 am

Most times, we become the people we judge. It just takes time. I do hope when your children want to judge you, they say the good motives behind your leaving them for their grandmother.

This is a wonderful story!

Solomon Hamza link

15/3/2023 07:52:33 pm

Stories do not need to carry the lenghy pages of novels to send captivating messages to it's reader. That's the kind of story Motherhood is: short, simple but with a powerful message that leaves one thinking long and hard about the eccentricity of life. Certainly, for one truly understand something, one has to experience it as they say," experience/ life isthe best teacher."
The writer began her creative non fiction with a similar scenario with her mother who received all the blame for negligence. Down the line, while trying to make end's meet for her children, came face to face with the glaring truth --- motherhood came with bundles of responsibility and sacrifices. The responsibility of all mother's from childbirths to nurturing their children into adulthood and the sacrifices attached to it which usually involves time.
I would commend the writer for her choice of point of view which did well in conveying her message first-hand.
The writer ends her story with a wish, a wish I'm sure most readers said a quiet amen to at the end of the read. A wonderfully written story, kudos to the writer.

Temitope Oni link

16/3/2023 12:04:31 pm

I am not married yet and I already envisage shipping the kids off to my mum for the holidays. The stress of going to work while pursuing your dreams combined with taking care of children is a whole lot. So yes your kids will understand when the time comes, the same way you did.

Rebecca

20/3/2023 11:41:18 am

Did you say shipping off?😂

20/3/2023 11:45:11 am

Short and captivating.
I think as we grow, we also tend to understand things better.
I remember how many times I've judged my parents when I was younger but now I see the light in most of the decisions they took.
Motherhood takes a lot I hope I grow to be an amazing mother to my kids.

Ezekiel Blessing Idoreyin

23/3/2023 10:42:28 am

Short and beautiful.
I enjoyed every bit of the adventure.

MOTHERHOOD

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Copyright @SprinNG 2023

MOTHERHOOD

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Copyright @SprinNG 2023​

Copyright @SprinNG 2023