A Second Chance at Goodbye

1/4/2022

By Olivia Onyekwena

an old soul in celestial transit
do you watch me from the sky?
I stare long at these photo frames
of me and you from times before
your aura lingers on in the passenger seat
with no one singing along
to our favourite song

on this three-hour ride to the place
where bodies meet sand and stone
when this earth's journey comes to an end
if I see you again
do you promise to say goodbye
before you leave?

Writer’s Biography

Olivia Onyekwena is a writer and poet who writes about memories, lost love, and what-ifs. She is inspired by starry and moonlit nights together with the tons of tv shows she consumes. Her dream is to write and create a series of young adult TV shows alongside recording multiple podcast episodes and a football show. When Olivia is not writing, she's reading fanfiction.

7 Comments

Ezioma Kalu

1/4/2022 12:43:07 pm

All I have left of you is the 'memories.' And they too, would fade soon. If I see you again, please say goodbye before you walk away...

This poem hits quite the spot.

Friday Praise link

1/4/2022 02:06:23 pm

The beauty of the words is undeniable, and the fact that the writer is able to capture the feeling of loss in few stanzas is also beautiful. She misses her love one and boom transformed feelings to words. Personally I think this piece is not far from perfect but needs some corrections. There's literally little use of punctuation marks. No comma where it's supposed to be for instance,
where bodies meet sand and stone
when this earth's journey comes to an end
There's no comma here when it's clearly supposed to have one cause the flow of the poem and also to offer a good reading out loud. If punctuation marks are effectively utilized then this piece will undoubtedly be a good and better poem.

Edith

2/4/2022 04:04:37 pm

Personally I love poems or I would say I enjoy reading poems that are short but are able to clearly convey the message intended.

Concerning the use of punctuation marks, some say when writing poetry you are free to decide the use of punctuation marks while for others it's compulsory.

Personally I feel the use of punctuation marks gives the reader the flow, where to stop, where to breathe,where to exclaim , and when to ask questions.

The poem tells the story of a lost love, I could figuratively say the persona lost a loved one to the cold hands of an unexpected death.

Gege Eniola

2/4/2022 06:59:58 pm

This piece talks about memories the writer has concerning a soul which was close to hers before it moved to the great beyond.

I love the choice of words used as they make one able to visualize and feel the pain as that of the writer.

The second verse also portrays the hope the writer has; wanting to meet this soul once again without it being sudden.

I think this is a great piece and it's quite relatable.

Ehimen

27/4/2022 11:18:53 am

Stop it will ya?

They never say goodbye...maybe there'll be a second chance to, maybe that's why they don't at first.
Goodbyes hurt.
But not saying goodbye? Hmmm

Thank you, Olivia.

Chioma

28/4/2022 08:41:39 am

The author describes the different phases(good times, bad times, sorrow, depression, despair) of life and our natural response to these times.
The author used relatable expressions to explain the ways we react to these phases of our lives, and how most times, the most responsive way is to rid ourselves of the pain.

Olajumoke link

30/4/2022 09:27:24 pm

An unexpected departure
A connection forever lost between two souls
One dead, one alive
One last chance at goodbye.....the afterlife.
The heartbreak of loosing a loved one is indescribable, the perfect portrayal of emotions in this poem is second to none. An amazing and intelligent write up.